Fate

I am not a superstitious person, but somehow I still hold some belief in fate and destiny. Even though I don't really buy the idea of destined life, still I can't deny the existence of the affection of unknown power. I am not religious over it, just that I believe one's value like determination, persistence, trustworthy, patience, loving, faith and etc have decided one's success in his life. No matter what, as long as you work hard and hold faith in it, one will never get too far from success. :)

There is once, my friend told me, "There is always something that you can't attain, regardless of how hard you work for it. Sometimes things just not meant to be yours. Learn to accept the failure in life even though its bitter and let go." I don't use to accept words like that as it sounds harsh for me. As I used to believe that "When theres a will, theres always a way." So over and over again, I have work hard to prove that I am right. Now that I have succeed and showed that I can do it if I study harder, I can get good grades too.

Sadly it doesn't work well on other things. Other things like relationship and friendship. Salary and good grades will be awarded if I work hard and concentrate in class. But will I get the equal payback if I work hard on friendship and love too?

I sound stupid now and I am fooling myself around for asking silly questions like these. I know the answer is a BIG NO NO. Friendship and Love are feelings that grew by days through caring and loving among people. It can't be calculate using a maths formula, there will never be a fair game. One shouldn't be calculative if you are to gain a good friendship or long-lasting couple.

I have been thinking of these lately. Am I being too calculative towards friends? Am I being too demanding over a relationship? Sometimes I feel like I was being treated as a nobody. Just because I am trying to be considerate and choose not to voice out. I am tired to think on behalf of the others before myself. Do you understand me? The thought of stay-or-leave keep struggling in my mind. I just wish that you would understand more.

May be fate really does exist, even though its unseen and unreachable. I believe its been around us always. Fate made us best friends. Fate has brought us together and let us work it out ourself to the end. Should I still keep faith in it? I need to be convinced that I should, as I am slowly losing it now. Before the fate has also tear us apart.