Afraid

I think I am getting more coward by days, as I found myself started to feel scared easily. I am.. especially too scared to lose...

I am scared of losing the one I love and care... 

I am scared of the times which my love ones are no longer staying beside me...

I am scared of passing through the days without my love ones supporting me...

I know I am demanding, and that I am asking a little too much now. But I just couldn't help myself of not being afraid.

You used to comfort me and hold me around your arms when I cry. "Silly girl." you said. Yes, I am. I didn't learn my lesson well, and so I am still not good in holding my tears.

You used to take care of me when I was weak and sick. But there is nothing I can do for you, when you need to. And that makes me feel helpless.

You used to laugh on my jokes and silliness, and seldom got angry with my pranks. You used to scold me when I am not listening to you, but you will never raise your hand on me. 

Why can't things stay the same as they were, as usual, as they used to be? I hate changes as I am not good in adapting to changes. Yet, sadly, changes is unavoidable.

"Afraid of nothing and be strong, don't let the others take granted on you." you said. You used to tell me whenever I got upset with friends in school. Will you get disappointed and worried if you found that I am still a crying baby when going through hard times?

"There is always times when we have to learn how to let go of something." said my besties. Yes, I know it well. But its always hard when it comes to action. Someday, somehow, I know I will finally have to learn, regardless of my willingness.